The State of the Nation: Being a Periodic Review of What's Heppening Now, No. 3

Out in Chicago land they convict the former governor, and he's soon on his way to the rock pile to join the guy he replaced.  That makes the state 2 for 2 in convict governors.  They oughta move the State House to Joliet or some other lock up and save a lot of time on trials.  I'm a pol in Illinois and I think it's time to get an honest job.  As a matter of fact, I'm anybody in Illinois and I'm thinking a nice igloo on an ice floe might be a good place to relocate myself to.  I mean what is up with that place.  Now they have Flash Mobs stripping stores like locusts strip corn fields.  And, when they ain't stripping stores, they're beating the stuffing out of anyone they see.

This is called after school activity, I guess.


The news says Blago the Magnificent was convicted of trying to shake down a hospital and sell the Senate seat that once held the skinny butt of the current president of these Untied States, which leaving that chair behind to go to the highest bidder begins to look like the smartest thing that "Maroon's" done so far.  I dunno but that "Blago" the Con should have been convicted for two other things: having an un-spellable, unpronounceable name and having the most stupid hair cut of any adult male in the country.  Then they should have gone on and indicted every person in the state who voted for this jerk.

In the meantime, former community organizer and Illinois Senator Obama is flying out to someplace west of the Hudson River...where, exactly doesn't matter, it's all the same...to talk to the folks about something called the economy.  Used to be when we had one it was the biggest in the world.  A few weeks ago I read that India, the land of elephants and tigers, holds that spot, now.  You think we're Avis to India's Hertz?  Think again, 'cause China, who is coming to the rescue of the Euro, is there, trying harder.  I don't know what Stretch can say to them farmers and truck drivers except maybe, "I'm sorry."  I have a pretty good idea what he will say though, "George did it.  Blame him, not me.  Gotta go now and rent a luxury hotel somewhere for me and my staff."

Back closer to home Andy boy is looking for re-election gold at the end of a rainbow and learning show tunes, I guess, while he helps pull the chain on Western Civ.  Enough said.

I'm really waiting to hear what B.O. has to say to those quiet folks out there in corn land about your dough and mine..  Maybe it's the first of a bunch of apologies, since three years ago he said he had a plan.  "Which one?" is my favorite question.  He'll be rubbing shoulders with the 14,000 Republican candidates all looking to come out on tope in the straw poll.  I figure there ain't enough straw in the world to go around.  Anyway, Bachmann and Ppalin are gonna shoot all the rest of them.

While they talk and shout and eat apple pie and apologize no one pays any attention to the hole in the roof and the fact that the floor's fallen into the cellar.

The hogs are happy though.

And, down in Los Alamos they're getting ready to have a fire sale.  What I can't figure is how do you have a wild fire in a desert?  It's a crazy ding dong place.  But, Oprah's got our back, so I ain't worried.  Not one bit.  I'm just gonna pry that horseshoe off the door and keep it in my pants.

Leastways with it there no one can whack me on the skull with it.