Something Simple, Something Cool

The sun has almost set on the hottest day of the year and I have opened the window in this small and stuffy room.  My upper lip is dripping, and my shirt is wet, but I'm a happy guy.  I done good at supper and also fortunately I put the A/C in the window this morning and our bedroom is a cool and dry 76.  Not a bird peeps outside, but one or two young children laugh and play in the neighbor's pool a street over.  It's a nice sound, and makes up for the lack of song bird evening serenades.

Back to supper, though.  Today was my turn preparing supper.  Last night I announced that I was going to make something simple, something cool.  I was going to make a tuna salad. Immediately Mariellen reminded me that I'd have to keep raisins and apples, which I have been adding lately, out of the salad.  That's because I'm not supposed to eat fruit with my main courses or my stomach will explode.  Rats!!!  And Kathy very quietly wondered if I would be using regular mayonnaise.  I knew that meant she'd prefer I use something else.

"Why don't you make something using the herbs in our garden, Dear?" said Mariellen smiling her most lovely wife smile at me.  I had my orders.  I didn't just fall off the truck.

So, before the temperature had reached the melting point of lead, I wandered out to the patch and snipped the tender tops off some green things: parsley, dill, tarragon and basil.  I got enough to satisfy me, and wandered back inside, washed the plants and put 'em in the fridge.  Then I grabbed three cans of tuna and opened them, squeezing the water into a little bowl for Benedict, Kathy's deaf white cat who lives downstairs and whom I need to like me.  He's a freak for water from the tuna can.  I'm waiting for the thank you note.

Next I took a lemon the size of Pluto out of the fridge and zested it, adding it to the tuna I had turned into a nice bowl and squished into little pieces, the juice, too went into the bowl with the tuna and zest.  Three stalks of celery and one onion both chopped into micron sized bits joined the growing mess.

I stood back and wondered what next.  I looked in the fridge and saw sour cream, Greek yogurt and real Hellman's calorie charged fat filled mayonnaise.  Guess what?  I came down half way between Kathy and me and mixed up some yogurt and mayo adding it to the bowl full of stuff.  Finally I chopped the weeds up and plopped them on top, mixed like I was making haroses for Passover and put it in the fridge until supper.

Kathy has cut up a little red onion and washed and spun some lettuce.  I had a couple of red tomatoes.  Mariellen fished two brand new cucumbers out of the patch.  There was a loaf of good solid bread, and soft butter.  So I assembled as they say on NPR, "plating up" the stuff in my best fancy casual style, and whistled them into the Dining Room.  Oohs and aahs told me I had done good...but I knew it all along.  The dishes were so clean after eating we just put them back in the cubbard.  (I really do know how to spell that word.)

Oh, yeah, I almost forgot.  The last thing I gave the mess of stuff was a blast of Dijon mustard.  I wondered about horseradish, and maybe I'll try that next.

"Did you write down your recipe, Dear?" she asked.  "Nope."  "Maybe you should in case we want to do this again."  Maybe.  Yeah, I've got your maybe.  Here it is:

Something Simple, Something Cool

3 can chunk white tuna in water
i/4 c. chopped fresh dill
1/4 c chopped fresh parsley
1t chopped fresh basil
1t chopped fresh tarragon
1 lge onion chopped
3 stalks celery chopped
1 lemon zested with juice added
1t Dijon mustard
1/4-1/2 c mayonnaise
1/4-1/2 c Greek yogurt.

Squeeze and drain liquid from Tuna, break into small pieces in large bowl.  Add all other ingredients.  Mix well.  Cover and let sit in fridge for at least an hour while flavors blend.  Serve on beds of lettuce or mixed greens with assorted raw vegetables and good bread.